Hold the Baby

When I had my daughter almost five years ago, my mom very strongly voiced her displeasure with baby seat carriers. You know, the car seats turned baby carriers. She hates them. With a passion.

I understood what she was saying. “Hold the baby.” Why wouldn’t I hold the baby? Once my daughter arrived, I understood there were times when I needed to be hands-free. But most of the time, I did want to hold the baby. (And now with my son, I’ve discovered babywearing and fabulous (locally made) SnuggyBaby wraps!)

And thanks to the article below, I understand the need to hold the baby even more. Thank you, Swedish, for putting it in words.

Hold the baby

By Jennifer Wojciechowski
Operations Coordinator, Health Education

In the US, we have a culture that encourages independence but are we performing our babies a disservice by isolating them in a car seat carrier or stroller?

Think about what we do when we’re holding the baby and walking around. We are bonding through touch, smell, eye contact, and talking. We can talk to them and teach them about the trucks and airplanes, the art work on the walls and flowers or the different colors on the packages at the store. Even when they listen to us talk to a companion or on the phone, they’re being exposed to communication. The more you talk with your baby the better. All of this starts with the children as newborns.

What sort of interaction do babies get when they’re isolated in a car seat carrier or stroller covered with a blanket or staring at the ceiling?

As the babies grow into toddlers, letting them walk is great exercise. There is growing concern about obesity in children, so think about what we’re teaching them when we contain them in a stroller while out for a walk or running errands. Parenting means that we have to teach them to…not eat the grass and that they must hold our hands in the parking lot or crossing the street.

Car seats are important and must be used in the car, but even the American Academy of Pediatrics is warning parents about car seat use outside of the car due to a high rate of injury they’re seeing in the emergency rooms from misuse of car seats.

Parenting is hard work. Parenting does not mean convenience. If we wanted something to love and cuddle but be convenient, then we should have adopted a cat. :)

Hold the baby.

Balance

The irony is not lost on me that I’m writing about work/life balance and I’m writing this on a Friday night.

I’m a pretty busy person. My calendar is usually full and because of my color-coding, it’s as colorful as a bag of Skittles. And it is difficult to manage the calendar and my life loves. I’m a pretty busy wife, mom, daughter, sister, granddaughter, friend, volunteer and coworker.

I’m probably not much different than you. Do you struggle with how to balance it all? Call it another God-thing but as I’m starting to bring things into focus in the beginning of 2011, several relevant posts have found their way into my Google Reader. Here’s what I’ve found interesting and you may as well.

• Is Your Calendar Managing You?  Why, yes it is. Thank you for asking.
• How to Cut Your Incoming Email by Half and Get More Done
• Time Management for Nonprofits
• Creating margin in a busy life
• Who Else Needs More Mental Focus
• Women Find Space of Their Own with Mom Caves
• Why to Switch to a Standing Desk and How to Build One I once knew an executive who used one, and swore by its effectiveness

So off I go to figure out how to cut my incoming email while standing at my newly built standing desk in my mom cave…

Making Comparisons

I am not a runner. I have pretty much no desire to become a runner.

But, my good friend Jenny is training for a half-marathon. She’s an inspiration. I love learning from her via her writing and she progresses on this journey. She recently wrote about Finish Times and how she struggles with comparing herself to others. She poses a question to her readers about whether they do the same.

Combine Jenny’s post with some recent experiences like:

• One of the other preschool moms invited all the moms over to her house for coffee during school…
• One of my friends invited me to join a group of moms from our church at a zumba class that meets during the day…
• Reading numerous blog posts from other moms who talk about their day-to-day activities…

…And frankly, I can’t help but compare myself. But why? Is there a tone of comparison competition between stay-at-home/work-from-home moms (SHM) and we working moms? (Obviously making generalizations here but you understand.)

I make a deliberate choice every day when I choose to go to work. I choose to be the best woman/wife/mom I can be and I can do that by gaining energy and having interactions in my workplace and the community. Staying at home doesn’t use my strengths. In fact, I think it plays on my weaknesses.

So - why is that I feel even weaker when I let myself compare? Probably because I shouldn’t and it’s a great lesson as to why. It seems like at the coffee, zumba, etc. allows SHM to develop deeper, meaningful relationships with other women that much quicker. And while I desire that as well, I’m confident in my decisions.

I love my life. My husband and kids.

I love my job. My coworkers and our mission.

I treasure the rare night out with my girl friends.

I treasure their relationship more.

I’m grateful every day that I get to have the opportunity to excel - at work and at home.

Anyone else feel like this? How do SHM feel about the topic?

We all have different strengths, desires and drives. What would female relationships look like if we didn’t compare ourselves but instead treasure each strength we all have?

Actually - let me tell you what it looks like. It looks like phone conversations with colleagues that turns personal with laughter. It is a dear friend who invites me to zumba with her after work a few nights a week. It’s scheduling time in an already hectic schedule to spend time with the women who love unconditionally, without judgment, in support.

For those of you who support and shine the light on my strengths and weaknesses, thank you for not making this world a competition.